Not So Romantic, But Real


How my views of love have changed
since getting married and having kids!
Back in my twenties
I visualized passion, romance,
some amazingly mystical
soul mate connection.
Now the most romantic thing
would be a day off
for myself
to not see or speak with anyone.
Now, love is getting the dishes done
and the litter box scooped
and the laundry folded
and the dinner cooked
and the children bathed…
if we have any energy left
at the end of the day
we might watch a show together.
We turn in,
wish each other good night
and sweet dreams.
His sleeping form
and intermittent snores
are strangely reassuring.
Not so romantic,
but real.

4 responses »

  1. Love this!! ❤ I remember someone a generation above me once said: Sometimes in a marriage you will feel like leaving the other, you will get so fed up of your partner you can't remember why you married him/her in the first place, at some point you will feel attracted to someone else, you will feel the beginning of a crush, BUT you will have other days when you feel head over heels in love with your partner again, you will have days when you feel like the luckiest person in the world, you will feel like your partner is everything, is your world, and you DON'T give in to those fleeting crushes you get on other people because you love your partner, because you have chosen to stay loyal to him/her, because you have promised to stay by his/her side through thick and thin.

    I love that, because I think it is more realistic, it is neither too rosy nor too bleak, sometimes the media shows us a picture of love that is either just super romantic and beautiful or a complete disaster. I think most relationships, romantic or not, is a little bit of both. ❤

    • Indeed, dear Trini, indeed. And also the personal values we bring into the relationship matter, because they give us direction during times of difficulty. I’ve had many moments where I thought I just wanted to live alone again, and then I remembered that being a part of a family and raising my children in a stable environment is very important to me. I’ve also come to realize that my own unconscious beliefs play a big part in how I’m feeling about my relationship on any given day. It’s so important to choose a positive mindset and decide to make that my experience…otherwise it’s easy to slip into negativity, especially on days that are overwhelming. Thanks again for being here and for sharing your wisdom. I love that you remember things people have said to you. It’s very sweet and tender. ❤ 🙂 ❤ 🙂

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