Self-Help Junkie

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I ordered more self-help books today…
they’ve been my drug of choice
since June.
I keep believing
someone else has found
the clear path to my healing.
I’m searching
for the recipe
the strategy
the tip
the trick
the magical incantation
the mantra
the meditation
the process
the 40 day workbook
the online program
the teacher, speaker, or coach
to help me feel ok
about my life, Β my self.
The hungry ghost looms large;
its insatiable appetite aches loudly.
I am overcome by everything.
I start to believe
that some mistake was made
when I came to Earth,
because clearly
I wasn’t meant for this world.
I pick up another self-help book.
Oh, someone else feels this way too?
I find some hope, some solace,
one moment of respite.
There are worse addictions.

27 responses »

  1. I was honestly the same for a very long time. What woke me up was the realisation that I was devouring the information in these book like a drug, it made me feel good but once I finished reading and I finished them fast, I tossed them aside looking for the next ‘Secret’. What I realised is that there were beautiful words of wisdom in these books, what I was not doing was taking that wisdom on board. I wanted the book to magically heal me but the truth is the book can only inspire, it is only you can heal you!

    So I picked up a book and I read it. I wrote down the key points, I reread it, I did the exercises it suggested and while I am far from healed there is finally a light at the end of the tunnel, I feel better each day. Soon I will move on to another book but not until I master this one. The book is not important, we are at all different stages in our awakening, find one that resonates with you and read it as though the universe will give you a practical assignment on it. Embrace the words.

    I truly hope you find what you are looking for ❀

    • Thanks friend for your lucid and encouraging words. Yes, I’m reading a book by Mastin Kipp called Claim Your Power and he mentions devouring the self-help books as a kind of gratuitous spiritual entertainment. So I am working my way through the book methodically, typing my answers, printing them out, putting them in a three ring binder…wanting to digest the process and refer back later. Best wishes and many thanks to you. β€οΈπŸŒˆπŸ™πŸ»βœ¨

  2. I love listening to teachers. I think I found peace when I stopped trying to be all sorted out and just enjoy listening to buts of truth. I think it was when I stopped needing to prove anything or get validation anymore. ❀

    • Hi friend! I went on Amazon and for some reason the book is ridiculously expensive. Maybe it’s out of print??? So I will try the library. Thanks for the recommendation. I look forward to reading it. β€οΈβœ¨πŸŒˆπŸ™πŸ»

  3. Hello! This is a wonderful poem. The last few lines spoke to me the most and I feel the same way about self help books. I really do think that because we feel this way that this is all the more reason that we should read self help books! Looking forward to more of your content.

    • Thanks so much Claire. That is a really good point. I also am trying to remember why I’m doing all of this readingβ€”I am wanting to learn, grow, evolve, be a better mother, teacher, daughter, sister, friend. So my intentions are noble and I can acknowledge myself for that. Thanks for being here and for your comment. β€οΈπŸŒˆπŸ™πŸ»βœ¨

  4. Your post was very touching. If I may, I would like to say that every behavior and pattern has a benefit. In what way does this search benefit you?

    What would it be like if you felt “ok” about yourself and your life? How would you most notice the difference? It may seem like an odd question, but until you can really quantify or qualify your goal, you could reach it and not even know.

    • Thank you for sharing your thoughts Meredith. I appreciate your offering that there are benefits to all of our behaviors; I can see that. This search benefits me immensely. I have learned so much from so many people who worked hard to distill their knowledge into books. It feels good to learn and to have new awareness and new ideas to work with. I feel connected to the world community of thinkers and learners. If I consistently felt ok about myself I’d experience a greater degree of peace and well-being than I’ve ever known. I look forward to this; I believe that it’s possible. I feel ready to relax into who I am fundamentally, and provide myself the feeling of empowerment and safety that I’ve been seeking in others, perhaps my whole life. Thank you for the thought provoking questions. I agree that until we have a clear idea of what the goal is, why we want to realize it, and what its realization would translate to in our real lives, we could miss it happening and never be the wiser. Best wishes to you! β€οΈβœ¨πŸŒˆπŸ™πŸ»βœ¨

  5. Self- help books are incredible as long as they provide productive, actionable content, I find that they can often lead you down the Rabbit hole and you end up even more lost than when you started! Here are my thoughts on which ones are the most useful and I truly hope that they help you find your way!

    https://innerapex.wordpress.com/category/books/

    • Thanks friend for the recommendations. I’ll check them out. I actually listened to The Power of Habit via Audible and I really appreciated it. Best wishes to you. May your path be clear and full of friends along the way.

  6. Self help books are my favorite addiction yet, but they only work when we do. Good luck on your journey, friend. I truly hope you find some relief.

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