Too Many Rules


A friend came and visited.
We sipped our mugs of tea
and filled each other in
on the comings and
goings of our lives.
He’s three months into
a fulfilling relationship
with a vibrantly beautiful
and talented woman.
I’m happy for him.
I shared about my sadness,
loneliness and isolation.
I told him how I wanted to be
financially autonmous
before dipping my toes
back into the waters
of love and relationships.
It’s been two years since
I’ve been with a man,
and my body feels the urge
to be held, to connect…
but I don’t trust myself
to attract a healthy man
into my life,
and I’m still reeling
from the pain of my divorce.
So I’m waiting.
He told me I have too many rules,
that if I stop myself from desiring
I stop myself from moving forward.
Now my head is spinning.
Is it true?
Do I have too many rules?

5 responses »

  1. I think rules is a lopsided expressed energy….
    Align desires to your TRUE nature…
    some tend to like a dimmed view….
    don’t dim down….your light is amazing….
    Shine on and be comfortable in your TRUE nature…
    Rules are for game players
    Elucidate your worth as you create your new foundation…
    Create an amazing adventure within your day..Namaste’

    • Deb, I LOVE what you shared here; thank you. Finding that alignment is key. It’s funny being a yoga teacher, able to help others find their alignment, and yet struggle with my own sense of alignment…very humbling. I suppose I need to slow down, breathe, and just ALLOW my true nature to pour forth. All of this worrying blocks the flow. Thanks again for your inspiring comment! πŸ™πŸ»β€οΈπŸŒˆβœ¨

      • Blessings Lorien
        I am a Reiki master in Usui..which is love and Karuna which is compassion..
        I have been on this path of wounded healer for 17 years…yet I encounter dimmed energy within myself…I too at times… encounter..crickets…for high guidance…
        Ones like you and I are in service to others better than serving ourselves at times…
        Yet…we are awakened to this condition..therefore…no extra wounding required…
        May you be filled with serenity in the gloaming….Namaste

      • Thank you again, dear one, for sharing your beauty and your wisdom. I am grateful to meet you in this space and send you my deep appreciation and thanks for your presence here and in this world.

  2. Blessings Lorien..
    I am a Reiki master in both Usui…which is love and Karuna…which is compassion…
    I have been on this wounded healers path for 17 years..yet still…looking from within to my own soundings at times can render …crickets!!!!
    We do serve others better than ourselves most times..
    Yet..ones like you and I…at least are awakened to this and accept we indeed are beautiful while in repair!!!
    Namaste and have a lovely evening …

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