No One Is There


The struggle now
is between terror and peace.
Some days I wake up and feel fine.
Some days I wake up in terror.
There’s no rhyme or reason.
I just want to find home.
I want to create stability.
I’ve begun sending feelers out
in different directions;
I want to open multiple income streams.
I know I have talents and abilities,
but they’ve been buried deep within
for so long, it’s a process to uncover them.
It takes time to monetize one’s talents…
But I don’t have much time.
My eviction date is set for July 15.
I need to find a home.
How do I find a home
when I don’t have any money?
The people I thought were my friends
have all disappeared.
I guess that divorce, depression and eviction
are too inconvenient for normal, stable people.
What has happened in my life
that in my time of greatest need,
I look around, and no one is there?*

*Just wanted to acknowledge that there are people here who have been generous in expressing their concern…so I didn’t want to come across as ungrateful for that.

4 responses »

    • How did you get out of it? How long did it take? Is there anything you wish you could’ve known as you were going through it? What would you like to say to that self who was going through it…words of encouragement that you can now offer to the you of the past?

      • Even in the very darkest days there are lighter days ahead even though you may not know it or believe it know. You will rebuild. You will be stronger than you ever imagined. I know this to be true. One day, you will too. All that you have to do now, just to get through each day, is all a means to that end. I am with you in this.

      • Thank you so much, beautiful sister, for your words of strength and wisdom. I learned just recently to just focus on the day, and take it one day at a time. Because if I attempt to project too far into the future I just start to have an anxiety attack.

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