Living in Uncertainty


I should be used to living in uncertainty by now
but I suppose my brain is hardwired for familiarity
because this not knowing is generating so much…fear.
Or is it resistance, disappointment, frustration?
I don’t know.
I just remember there was a time
I expressed gratitude to him
for saving me from my uncertainty
and then a short time later
he was done saving me.
And that feeling of rejection, betrayal, abandonment
lingers on.
Years later, it lingers.
Can someone tell me when and how
I’ll really feel and know
at the deep core of my being
that it’s all going to be okay?

2 responses »

    • So true. I still tell myself the story that if only I had more money I’d feel happier, more secure, be able to relax, etc. I know this is a very common thought and that many people have it…and that ultimately it isn’t true. I need to feel happy now with what I have, while moving toward financial security, in whatever form it can be found…

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