Category Archives: recovery

Take Your Medicine

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Focus on the positive
Keep going
Keep breathing
Even when you’re crazy tired
or feeling just plain crazy
keep going
keep breathing.
This moment will pass.
Nothing lasts forever.
Everything is temporary.
Even when you think all is lost,
it isn’t.
Flowers grow in the cracks of cement,
rains come to drench the parched earth.
The stars come out whether we see them or not
and the cicadas hum their strange song
whether or not we can hear them.
In this great medicine wheel of life
there is always something being offered by this moment.
Summon your courage
and be willing to take your medicine.

I Am Enough

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I am enough.
I am enough?
I am enough!
What a relief.
I don’t need a man to take care of me,
I don’t need a man to make me feel loved,
I don’t need a man to keep me safe,
I don’t need a man to validate my existence.
I am enough.
I can take care of me.
I can love me.
I can keep me safe.
I exist. No need for validation. I exist.
I am enough.
Hallelujah!
I am enough!

No Summit

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As goals are reached
new goals must be set
or else we will plateau.
This time last year,
my goal was just to make it through the day.
At the end of each day
noting that I was still alive—
this felt like an accomplishment.
I survived.
As time went on and the months flew by,
my goal was to make it through
the betrayal, the loss,
the pain, the shame, the heartbreak,
the utter devastation of divorce.
The divorce was finalized in January.
I survived.
As time went on and the months flew by,
my goal was to figure out new housing,
to keep my kids in their school,
somehow, someway
to maintain stability for my children.
All of the pieces are falling into place.
I survived.
It looks like the Universe
is conspiring in my favor.
What is my goal now?
More than financial stability,
more than a home,
more than recognition…
I want to know what my
deepest, truest offering is,
and how I can share my gifts with the world
in a more impactful way.
I’m diving deeper in now,
asking for guidance,
asking for the plan to be revealed
so that I can keep trekking up this mountain
that has no summit.

Living in Uncertainty

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I should be used to living in uncertainty by now
but I suppose my brain is hardwired for familiarity
because this not knowing is generating so much…fear.
Or is it resistance, disappointment, frustration?
I don’t know.
I just remember there was a time
I expressed gratitude to him
for saving me from my uncertainty
and then a short time later
he was done saving me.
And that feeling of rejection, betrayal, abandonment
lingers on.
Years later, it lingers.
Can someone tell me when and how
I’ll really feel and know
at the deep core of my being
that it’s all going to be okay?

Your Loss

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The whole point is to reclaim my life
to become happy…
Happiness and success are the best revenge.
Buckle up, brother,
I reckon
you’ll feel foolish some day
when you’re doing the same old things
and the same old people
in the same old way
And I’m lightyears beyond
your comprehension,
having taken
quantum leaps of faith and consciousness,
turned my life and my will over to something greater,
given thanks for the talents bestowed upon me
learned how to share my gifts in a way
that glorifies the One who brought me here
and brings joy and inspiration to seekers everywhere
and I’m living free, graceful, untarnished
by all the stories you told
when you didn’t know how to honor
the goddess within me…
you had to discard me.

…your loss

Escapee

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She rises

Every morning

She gets back up again

Maybe you thought

She’d become your

Beast of burden

Maybe you thought

Her body was your home

Your property

But you were just a visitor

And you overstepped

Your bounds.

You couldn’t tame her

She is not meant to be

Fully domesticated

You couldn’t breed

The wildness out of her

And her fierceness

Scared the hell out of you.

Now you’re riding a new beast.

She seems docile enough,

Unthreatening.

She may tolerate

Your whippings, your

Bit and bridle

The reins

You use to steer her…

You might ride this one for a bit

Until she becomes old and fat and slow

But the one you left

Is still wild

You couldn’t break her

And every morning she rises

And runs with the sun and wind

And feels her free blood in her veins

And celebrates her escape

From your slavery