The way my emotional system works,
I am a failure,
unless I am perfect,
but I am never perfect,
therefore I am always a failure.
Recently I have begun challenging this assertion.
(Thank you therapy!)
I have begun toying around with the idea of
Good enough mom:
Look, my children are still alive!
Good enough yoga teacher:
I show up to class on time, sober!
Good enough neighbor:
There is no trash in my front yard!
Good enough meditator:
I show up to my cushion every day!
I like this idea of adequacy.
It’s so much more human than perfection.
Do you ever wish you could just disappear,
Sink into oblivion as if you had never existed,
Forget all the trials and tribulations of human life
And rest endlessly, blissfully unaware of any of these struggles?
Yeah. Me too.
I start praying,
then ask myself
Who am I bargaining with?
Certainly not some sky wizard,
God is within.
God is the peace and the presence
we feel inside
when we get still and breathe
and really feel and know that
ALL IS WELL.
I choose to feel good.
Even though I was programmed
by people who were programmed
to believe that life is a struggle
and there is never enough good,
today I choose to exist in the possibility
that I can feel good most of the time.
Even though I’ve made lots of mistakes,
even though I don’t have all the answers,
even though I’m not sure of my future,
I choose to feel good.
I can feel grateful for my past;
it brought me to this now.
I can feel grateful for this now;
it is holding me and giving me
this opportunity to awaken.
I can awaken to my power to choose
how I think and act and feel.
Today, I choose to feel good.
Just letting this moment be enough
and exploring the idea of contentment,
realizing there are no missing pieces—
finally, the freedom she had been seeking
revealed itself eaily and naturally,
as if it had always been there.
Then she realized that it really
HAD always been there.
The moment she chose
to pay more attention to her inner experience
than to the judgments of others
she recognized the sweet truth of it all.
She keeps striking out in the darkness,
but there is no one there to fight.
The shadows dance and slip away,
and she is exhausted to her very soul,
sparring with aggressors that don’t exist.
How to be successful in battle
when the one she fights
is on the inside?
Learning to trust the Self…
not the little ego self
that’s always wanting and grasping
and never satisfied,
but the Divine Self,
the deeper, more expansive Self,
the One who moves with the currents of Nature
and who listens and waits
underneath the noise and turbulence
of our contrived human sorrow.
The One who waits for us to wake up,
and pause, and breathe
and see how beautiful peace is—
this is the One I practice to know,
this is the One I show up for every morning,
this is the One I am when I become still
and close my eyes, and journey inwards…
This is the One I am learning to trust.