Category Archives: self-awareness

One At A Time

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One foot in front of the other,
one breath,
one step at a time.
See what needs to be done,
do it,
one thing at a time.
Self-care…
Eat. Sleep. Bathe.
Drink plenty of water.
Stay alive.
One moment at a time.
Many times recently
I have wanted to give up.
I have felt overwhelmed
and it has all seemed so hopeless,
because I was trying to figure it out
all at once…which is just plain crazy.
I remember life is lived
one day, one hour, one minute,
one second at a time.

Feeling

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Playing with the idea
that I don’t have to wait for something external to change
in order to achieve the feeling states I desire.
So I speak them aloud as if they are happening now,
and I feel into these states, one by one.
I feel complete.
I feel happy.
I feel safe.
I feel abundant.
I feel powerful.
I feel confident.
I feel loved.
I feel wanted.
I feel sexy.
I feel inspired.
I feel creative.
I feel welcome.
I feel connected.
I feel happy.
I feel healthy.
I feel grateful.
I feel peaceful.

I feel worthy.
I feel clear.

I feel excited.
I feel free.

As I speak these words aloud
I notice what it feels like
to really embody these states of being.
I end up feeling uplifted, amazed by the shift.
I’ll keep doing this work and I’ll see where it takes me.

Somehow

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The to do list hasn’t shrunk,
but somehow I’m feeling less afraid.
If anything, I have more responsibilities,
but somehow I’m feeling more peace.
What happened?
Am I fooling myself?
I don’t think so.
Maybe it was waking up early,
sitting in the quiet
while the world was still dark.
Maybe it was the run I took
in just above freezing temps…
Maybe I remembered to breathe more.
Maybe I realized I can trust more,
I can have faith,
I can believe in myself
and the ability to pull through
each challenge one by one.
I don’t know exactly how it happened,
but somehow it did,
and right now, I’m smiling.

What’s Next

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So tired…
and so much to do.
My mind keeps heckling me,
telling me
I need to do this and I need to do that…
but I’m so tired.
I’ve been up since 4:30 am,
going since then,
and my body just wants rest.
But how will I get it all done?
I breathe.
I tell myself I love myself no matter what.
I try to believe myself.
I take another breath.
I remember that it can’t all get done at once.
I take another breath.
I write this poem.
I’ll celebrate this win,
remind myself it will be ok.
I’ll breathe again,
and figure out what’s next.

How It All Gets Done

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I’m waiting to feel motivated
to meditate
to exercise
to make that phone call
to run that errand
answer that email
buy those groceries…
and the motivated feeling never comes.
Then I remember
I need to just do it.
After it is all done
my mind feels good
for having attained a state of completion.
If it needs to be done,
I don’t wait to feel like doing it,
I just do it.
And that’s how it all gets done.

No More Regrets

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This morning I lost it
on my meditation cushion.
my six year old son
kept wanting things from me,
and I was calm about it,
up until the point
where I wasn’t.
I got angry.
I began to yell
things about
needing one moment to myself
trying so hard
and doing so much for other people
and don’t I deserve one moment to myself?
And then of course I regretted it.
I felt guilty, ashamed.
I asked for forgiveness
from my two children and my sister,
who had to hear me storming about,
losing my temper, being crazy.
Dear God,
help me wake up more,
so that I can act in such a way
that there are no more regrets.

A Mighty Battle

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A mighty battle is being waged,
a battle between the parts of me
that yearn for more out of my life,
and the parts that don’t believe
that more exists,
or that more is relevant,
or that more is possible.
Fear creeps in, and doubt;
if I let them take hold,
I get depressed.
That’s the old me.
The new me
knows that more is possible.
The new me can
look at my thoughts objectively,
sort through and find the helpful ones
and give my soul permission
to go for it.
At this point, I’m pretty biased.
I’m not going to be fair and give equal
help to both sides of the battle.
I’m going to pick which side I want to help.
I want the new me to win.