I want to get creative.
I want to paint
I look around my house.
It’s cluttered, disorganized.
I can’t create with my house like this,
I tell myself.
So I pick up.
I look around my house again.
It’s beautiful. Neat. Luminous.
But now I’m so damn tired
I no longer have the energy to create!
Maybe I need to learn how to create
regardless of the neatness of my space.
I was exploring creative expression
and a lack thereof
with my EMDR therapist on Monday.
And it came to me suddenly…
If I could simply start doodling,
just to get the creative ball rolling,
eventually the momentum would pick up
and I could flow along with it.
Right after the session,
I went down to my car
and took out of my purse
a fine point Sharpie and a blank index card
and I wrote the word
M O M E N T U M
and some wavy lines all around it.
I got my watercolors out
and worked on two paintings.
The next night and the night after that
my kids and I drew together.
Same for the next morning.
That afternoon I worked on a mandala,
gel pens on black paper,
and it felt good to create,
and I realized, yes,
momentum is real.
If you are feeling creatively blocked friend,
just begin something.
Just get that ball rolling and you’ll see…
MOMENTUM is your friend.
Hmmm…for some reason I keep hoping that these NaPoWriMo prompts will get easier, but they seem to be getting harder, perhaps because of what is happening in my external world. But anyway, here goes. Today’s prompt asked us to write a list of all of the identities with which we associate ourselves, and then divide that list in two more lists, one list of identities that make us feel powerful and another list of identities that make us feel vulnerable. Then we write a poem in which an identity from one list is speaking to, or contending with, or challenging an identity from the other list. What a head game. Luckily I’m always game to play in my head, so, let’s see what happens.
I wrote my list, and artist and critic were both there. I figure that this a great place to start.
Hey! Me here.
Who do you think you are
getting those art supplies out?
You aren’t any good
and no one cares what you
are trying to create.
Oh sweetie, there you go again.
Why do you think you need to be good?
This act of creation is just for you….
you don’t need to impress anyone else,
and especially yourself.
Drop the pressure and radiate your light.
Life is your work of art.
Let your genius shine.
You don’t have to try so hard, friend…
Just relax and let your genius shine.