Tag Archives: consciousness

All Is Well

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She stopped. Sat down.
Breathed. Ventured within.
As her shoulders relaxed away from her ears
She could hear the same old fears
rattling around her brain,
clamoring for attention.
She dropped her awareness deeper,
all the way down into her belly.
There she felt the ancient tension
of the ones who struggled for survival,
the ones who toiled and strained
and numbed their pain
with the fruit of the vine
again and again.
Then she prayed,
calling in the Angels,
The Teachers, The Wise Ones,
The Guides, The Ascended Masters,
The Well Ancestors:
Thank you for being present.
Thank you for holding me
in your Matrix of Light.
Thank you for rewiring my neural circuitry.
Thank you for restructuring my DNA.

Thank you for helping me to
see what needs to be seen,
do what needs to be done,
hear what needs to be heard,
forgive what needs to be forgiven,
heal what needs to be healed…

Breath by breath,
forward and backward,
across all time and all space,
eventually
she sits complete within herself
in the center of this Universal Mandala
feeling and knowing
ALL IS WELL.

I’ll Call it Grace

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Something beautiful is happening…
I think it might be resilience?
Stamina?
Endurance?
Wisdom gained from experience?
But as I found myself caught
in my monthly darkness today,
instead of falling all the way down
into the dark hole of depression
and believing my life was never good
and never will be good
I remembered that this was a temporary darkness,
and all I had to do was ride it out.
I prayed. I breathed.
I reassured the little girl in me
who was never allowed to feel sad or angry
that I saw her and loved her.
It didn’t change the mood.
it was still awful and dark and sad,
but some part of me knew this was temporary.
What can I call this?
Empowerment?
Evolution?
Grace?

That has a nice ring to it.
I think I’ll call it grace.

I’ll Listen to that One

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When I’ve been pushing and pushing and pushing,

hustling,

going everywhere,

doing everything,

bouncing around like a ping-pong ball,

At some point my body says

Stop.

I’ve reached that point.

My body is saying

Stop. Slow Down. Pause. Rest.

And yet I keep going.

It’s catching up with me.

I feel exhausted.

I want to rest,

but the children need to eat breakfast

and get on the school bus.

I drag myself out of bed;

I’m praying

God be with me. Have mercy. God be with me.

The doomsday prophet in my head says

It will always be like this.

The child in my head says

This isn’t fair.

My body keeps repeating

Stop. Stop. Stop.

It’s getting louder.

And I’m wondering when I’ll get the hang

of single parenting, really.

Some other voice says

Just one day at a time, darling,

just one step at a time.

I think I’ll listen to that voice.

Beautiful Present

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Ahhhhh….awake early, before six.

A quiet meditation, prayer and song.

A gorgeous walk along the canal,

the river lower than I’ve ever seen it,

revealing water-carved stones,

jagged edges smoothed

by the relentless flow of life.

Breakfast, reheated leftovers

from last night’s dinner—delicious.

Then energy work.

Then a second breakfast…

Perfectly easy to peel hard-boiled eggs,

tea, berries.

Then drum circle,

and I was moved nearly to tears

to sit with these beloveds

and share a moment together,

Connecting through rhythm

and the space between the pulses

of our drum beats, our heart beats.

Then lunch, ahh…nourishment.

When I taught my yoga classes

it felt like such a privilege,

so sacred to witness these beings

finding center, finding stillness, breathing…

And then a beautiful snack with tea

in the afternoon sun,

and I think my heart might burst

at the light kissing all the leaves golden,

and the crispness of the air

and the blueness of the sky

and the openness of my mind

finally coming home,

finally coming home

to rest in this beautiful present moment.

All Is Well

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Your mind is always trying to fix things;
don’t listen to it, it can’t see the whole picture.
Your unconscious wounds are pushing you
to numb out, because feeling feels unsafe;
don’t numb out, we need you here, ALL of you.
There’s another aspect of you, the space of awareness,
bigger than your body, bigger than your mind or your wounds.
It surrounds you; it holds you; it loves you and sees you always.
Stay in that space.
Just let yourself be held.
You’ll feel and know that all truly is well.

My Work

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I love how it doesn’t matter how much
I’ve attempted to stay present but failed miserably…
I love that no matter how many times my mind
hijacked my consciousness with thoughts of the past
or thoughts of the future,
the present always holds me.
I always am here.
I always am now.
My work is to know this deeply,
integrating awareness of the present moment
through bodily sensations,
through breath,
through the intention to be of service.
I see the perfection of my journey,
how all experiences led me to this moment.
All I can feel now…
…is gratitude.