Tag Archives: faith

In the Midst of Chaos

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Where is the balance point
between the effort and the ease?
Where is the grace
that allows forgiveness to find me?
Where is the sweet one
who will coax my heart out of hiding?
Where is the soul nourishment
that will sustain me?
I keep trying, trying, trying.
I’m exhausted from the effort
of teasing apart the jumbled mess
of other people’s perceptions
and finding my true self
concealed somewhere deep within.
Where am I,
who am I,
in the midst of all of this chaos?

As I Am Ready

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What if I stopped trying so hard to be good,
to stay ahead, to get it right, to get it done?
What if I could just accept
that this life is a process
and I will never be done?
What if I could really feel and know
that I will one day die,
and it might be sooner than I thought,
and then I will simply be gone?
How would I live
if I knew I didn’t have as much time
as I hoped I did?
What if I could wake up in this moment
and recognize that everything,
all of it,
is a gift?
What if I could stop blaming others
for where I am,
take charge of my life,
and step into my full power?
I’ll ask the questions
and have faith that the answers
will reveal themselves
as I am ready to see them.

A Dream is Enough

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The quote above is from Deida’s book The Way of the Superior Man

After being told for so long
by the one I had pledged to love
that there was something wrong with me,
that I was good for nothing,
lazy, selfish, irresponsible,
and at the cause of all
our collective misfortunes,
it goes without saying
that it feels quite refreshing to be alone.
Without all of the noise,
the criticism, the discouragement,
the manipulation, the control
and—let’s be plain—the abuse,
I can finally begin
to tease apart the threads of the veil
that had been woven around
my eyes, my mind, my body, my heart.
I can finally begin to discern
what is real and true for me,
who I really am.
As I learn to exist in this new reality
and heal my bruises and tend to my wounds,
I feel myself growing stronger, more sure
of the good that surrounds me,
the good within me.
As I connect with and exist inside this good,
I allow myself to dream about what is possible.
I dream about deep, intimate connection
first with myself,
and then, one day, with another.
I dream about a man
who is aware of his presence,
who sees his depth of awareness
as his most valuable asset.
I dream about myself
standing in my power and grace with this man,
who wants to honor me with his strength,
as I honor him with my devotion.
For now it is a dream.
For now, a dream is enough.

For The Better

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Last night, something happened.
Something changed.
Was it sitting in a healing circle
with a vibrant group
of beloved colleagues,
sharing our
brags
desires
accountability
gratitude
and why’s?
Was it the cacao
administered in a ceremonial way,
calling on the four directions,
ancestors, guardians and guides?
Was it my posture as I sat there,
hands over my heart, swaying,
eyes closed, as I listened?
Had everything in my life
simply prepared me for that moment,
and suddenly,
I caught a glimpse of what is possible?
Whatever it was,
something changed.
I came home,
and although it was late,
I was inspired.
I started making lists
of things I could make and offer,
to bring me closer to my goal
of financial autonomy.
I had visions of my creations
delighting and inspiring the hearts
of countless beloveds.
I actually had to make myself go to sleep…
I was buzzing with ideas,
recognizing that
I am truly free to be me,
and life is full, FULL of possibility.
Something’s changed…
for the better.

What Is Real

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Let me use my imagination for good.
Instead of picturing the worst,
let me picture the best.
Let me say
No matter how this turns out,
it will be more amazing
than I ever could have possibly imagined.

Let me breathe
and settle into this moment.
Let me feel and know
that I am loved,
cared for,
seen,
provided for.
Let me stand in my strength and truth,
and move forward on my path,
transcending limitations
and expressing what comes through,
bridging the visible and the invisible.
Let me remember my Divine Nature,
and never again doubt what is real.

Closer to Peace

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Healing isn’t linear.
As much as we want it to be,
as much as we want to control this process,
there comes a moment
when we need to submit,
surrender to the Divine Will,
and let go into the inevitable.
There is no neat line to walk on,
only spirals and curves
and portals to different dimensions…
quantum realities,
awaiting our observation,
our awakening.
I’ve discovered
that trying to control
leads to more struggle,
but breathing,
accepting where I am now,
and praying earnestly
brings me closer to peace.
If you are suffering in this moment,
this is my wish for you:
That you breathe,
accept where you are now,
and pray to your Higher Power
with an earnest heart,
that you may be brought
closer to peace.

This One

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Trust.
Faith.
Hope.
These qualities that mean nothing
until something major happens—
death, breakup, loss,
annihilation, devastation…
And precisely when we need these qualities,
this is when they seem to desert us.
The one in us who knows we need them,
the one in us who strives to find them,
this is the one we need to trust.
This is the one in which we need to have faith.
This is the one we look to for hope.
May we connect with this one.