Tag Archives: holding

To Be Held

Standard

As a teacher I can be in control;
I tell you what to do,
and I expect you to do it.
But when I’m the student,
I get antsy…I want to fiddle with things.
Tonight I was a student
in a breathwork class.
I remembered the necessity of trust
and surrender,
allowing the teacher to hold the space for me.
It felt strange at first,
because I am chronically the one who does the holding.
As I breathed
and the layers of my emotional body were peeled back
to reveal what was percolating underneath it all,
I remembered the saying
How you do anything is how you do everything.
I thought about how LIfe as my teacher
must get so frustrated with me, my fiddling.
Life just wants me to trust and surrender,
allowing the space to be held for me,
allowing myself to be held.

No More Waiting

Standard

Waiting.
Waiting for life to get easier,
for people to get me.
Waiting to have more support,
to have more sleep,
to be offered more opportunities.
Waiting.
As I keep projecting into the future,
fixing my sights on what could be,
what is happening now,
what cannot wait?
Every once in a while
I remember to breathe
and I ask myself why it took so long
to come back home to my body like this.
The potential to awaken
always right where I am,
but so well concealed
by the illusion of deferred happiness.
All of the holding patterns of my life,
I think,
are connected to the holding patterns of my breath.
I meditate so that I can remember to breathe.
I meditate for the sole purpose
(the soul purpose)
of breathing.
If I can remember to just breathe now,
to let it flow,
I won’t have the feeling
that I spend so much time waiting.
I won’t hold off, and I won’t hold on…
Now is life.
No more waiting.