Tag Archives: holidays

Down

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Down.
Of course I always was
at this time of year,
because of the absence of light,
because of the cold,
because of the way
the sun sets when I’m not ready.
But this year,
the Christmas decorations
are bringing me down too.
The Christmas carols
are making me cry
instead of sing.
I feel sad looking at my children.
I feel sad about everything.
I never knew something
that always brought such joy
could bring the sting of sadness
over and over and over again.
But I guess that this is how it goes
when home doesn’t feel like home,
when your husband isn’t a husband,
when your life isn’t what
you thought it would be.
Still, there’s something about the holidays
that makes this worse.
Is it the outward cheer
that throws my inner desolation
into such sharp relief?
Every time I see a Christmas tree
I want to weep.
Sometimes I do.
Please God, let me make it through.

Christmas Dogs

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xmas dogs

Please accept my apologies
for not posting on Christmas Eve
I was up late
wrapping presents
after making five pairs
of flannel pajama pants
with Christmas dogs on them

When did the holy days become so busy?

It’s 2am now, and I’m tired.
I should say “Merry¬†busymas,”
but I would like to acknowledge
the christened one,
the anointed one,
the holy one
that arrives in the darkest night
with promises of new light

So Merry Christmas, my friends,
in whatever way you celebrate it,
however it means to you.

May the light in you shine out
into the world
bearing the gifts of presence,
of stillness, of peace.