Tag Archives: hurting

Who Am I?

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Still hurting.
When will it stop?
Angry. Hurt. Lonely.
Tired. Overwhelmed. Triggered.
He’s finally moving out,
wanting to sort through
our years of life together,
our stuff.
I’m on edge.
I’m a caged animal,
hot, blinded with rage,
teeth bared, screaming,
throwing myself against
the bars of the cage,
hurting from the impact.
My thoughts are the cage.
My pain is the animal.
But who am I?

What Was Next

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I wanted to learn about surrender
so life gave me some challenges
to see if I was serious.
And these weren’t the sorts of challenges
where effort, reason, persistence and a plan
would bear fruit,
no, these were challenges that showed me
that I have absolutely no control
over anything at all
except for the way I relate to my experience.
Was I going to fight to hold on
to old constructs, to stay in the same place,
to be seduced by familiarity,
even though it was hurting me?
Or could I let everything go,
and watch my empty hands
open and ready to receive
what was next?