Tag Archives: mindfulness

Beautiful Present

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Ahhhhh….awake early, before six.

A quiet meditation, prayer and song.

A gorgeous walk along the canal,

the river lower than I’ve ever seen it,

revealing water-carved stones,

jagged edges smoothed

by the relentless flow of life.

Breakfast, reheated leftovers

from last night’s dinner—delicious.

Then energy work.

Then a second breakfast…

Perfectly easy to peel hard-boiled eggs,

tea, berries.

Then drum circle,

and I was moved nearly to tears

to sit with these beloveds

and share a moment together,

Connecting through rhythm

and the space between the pulses

of our drum beats, our heart beats.

Then lunch, ahh…nourishment.

When I taught my yoga classes

it felt like such a privilege,

so sacred to witness these beings

finding center, finding stillness, breathing…

And then a beautiful snack with tea

in the afternoon sun,

and I think my heart might burst

at the light kissing all the leaves golden,

and the crispness of the air

and the blueness of the sky

and the openness of my mind

finally coming home,

finally coming home

to rest in this beautiful present moment.

Being Alive

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All day long
I breathe in
I breathe out
most of the time unconsciously.
All day long
my eyes open
my eyes close
automatically, instantly.
All day long
my heart beats—
a miracle—
but I don’t notice,
because I’ve been programmed.
The program tells me
I’ve get to get somewhere
Do something
Fix something
Become somebody

and I’ve been living in this program,
asleep my entire life.
It’s time to wake up,
to ditch the old operating system
and install a new one.
It’s time for an update, an upgrade,
to remove the virus
and declutter the hard drive.
I’m ready to run the new program.
I’m ready to love just being alive.

Right Here in the Present

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It occurred to me
that if I want more joy in my life
I need to choose to enjoy each moment.
Life is made up
of everyday, simple moments,
repetitive tasks, things that need to get done.
If I’m rolling my eyes and groaning
every time I need to tidy up,
go grocery shopping,
do the laundry,
pick up after my kids,
I’d be constantly miserable.
But if I could cultivate a mindset
of gratitude and joy
for each of these simple moments,
day by day and breath by breath,
they would all add up to a joyful life.
I don’t need to defer my happiness
for someday, for one day,
for whenever this or that comes to pass.
Happiness is now,
where it always was,
where it always will be—
right here in the present moment.

If You’re Wondering

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If you’re wondering how long it will take,
how it will happen,
when you’ll feel strong enough,
healed enough,
ready enough…
stop wondering.
This isn’t a fill in the blank test.
This is your life.
There are no proper answers.
There is only you, opening as awareness
to what is alive in this moment.
Can you soften and relax
into the possibility
that you were led precisely here
because there was something
you could learn
from this living, breathing moment?
Live. Breathe.
Love this moment.
This moment is your life.

Meant For More

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Home alone
quiet sewing
listening to motivational speakers
tell me how to set goals
believe in myself
tweak my mental habits
connect with my why
and in general
optimize my existence
so that the earth will be better
for my having passed by this way…
I allow myself to dream
about bigger things…
something deep inside tells me
I am meant for more.
And it’s amazing to note
that now I’ve begun to value
this woman I’ve become
I can actually believe
what the inner voice is saying…
I really am meant for more.

Full-spectrum Human Being

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I sit here tired at the end of the day
and it feels like I don’t have much to say
to inspire or uplift or heal or comfort…
I’m just grateful for the quiet,
the sound of the night symphony,
insects whirring and buzzing,
the whoosh of an occasional car passing by,
a neighbor’s music floating in from somewhere.
. . . . . . . . . . .
I ask myself if I shouldn’t write these poems earlier,
when I first wake up
and the day is bright with promise
and I’m simply glad to be alive
and I still have energy to dream of what might be.
And which Lorien is really me?
The fresh, first thing in the morning meditator
or the tired single mother,
grateful that summer is almost over?
. . . . . . . . . . .
They’re both me of course,
but somehow the morning me
seems more desirable
than this tired, nighttime me who has been
completely used up by this day.
I suppose I need to hear from both of them,
because I am a full-spectrum human being,
because we are all full-spectrum human beings,
but sometimes we forget that the darkness
is just as relevant as the light,
and the movement of morning
isn’t necessarily more valuable than the stillness of night…

Feeling

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You can’t heal what you can’t feel…
and so my biggest task
has been just allowing the feelings to rise,
to be seen, acknowledged, embraced,
and finally felt.
For a long time I attempted to deny my feelings,
because they appeared too painful to accept,
and I was afraid of what might happen
if I allowed the tidal wave to crash over me.
It turns out that I was giving my attention
to my fear of the difficult feelings
rather than to the feelings themselves.
The fear made it all seem so much worse
that it really was.
Once I peeled back all my layers
of distraction, denial and defense
and exposed my tender heart to myself,
I saw that there was nothing to fear.
As the grief came up, the doubt,
the self-blame, the regret, the anger,
the loneliness, the abandonment,
the resistance and all the others
emerged as a procession,
one by one, to be fully received
and welcomed by me.
As I allowed these feelings to flow through,
I sensed underneath them my resilience,
my strength, and finally my hope
for new feelings to arrive
once I’ve made enough room for them
by letting the old feelings go…