Tag Archives: New Year’s Eve

Looking Back…And Forward

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Looking back
on a year of many ups and downs…
Finally, resolution is in sight.
This time last year,
you will still living in this house.
This time last year,
you had just begun a relationship with her.
This time last year,
you were denying it.
This time last year,
I was losing weight,
feeling anxious,
angry at your infidelity,
your dishonesty, your dishonor.
This time last year
I held you responsible for my happiness,
and I had fallen to the depths of despair.
But this time next year,
I see myself happier, healthier than ever before.
This time next year,
I will be standing on my own two feet financially.
Maybe this time next year,
I’ll have a wonderful man in my life,
a man who wants to love me
the way I deserve to be loved.
I won’t make the same mistakes with him
that I made with you.
In the midst of the nightmare
we shared
I learned
that my happiness is within me,
and when I really find it,
no one can take it away,
not even you.
Now it’s time for integration of what I’ve learned,
and space to dream of what is to come.
I’m in a more peaceful place now,
at home in my body, in my heart, in my mind.
I can say “Thank you”—sincerely—
for the lessons you taught me,
and I can wish you well.
May you find wholeness in 2019,
may your heart’s desires be granted.
May you know healing on all levels.
May you be free.

Musings on New Year’s Eve

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Ever since I can remember
I’ve mused about
how this particular time
has been made so special
by our species.
In the rest of the animal kingdom
creatures are going about their lives
just as they always have.
What do they care of
numbers on a clock,
numbers on a calendar?
Everything takes on the importance
that we assign to it.
Without the name “New Year”
this day would be as humble
as any other day.
A part of me feels amused
at all of the hullabaloo
we’ve made of the whole thing–
expensive dinners, champagne,
fireworks, masses of humans
waiting for a gigantic ball to drop…
And simultaneously
I cannot help
but let myself become swept up
in the current of excitement
over the New Year.
And so tonight I sat.
I chanted for all beings to find peace.
I imagined the planet
enveloped in lovingkindness,
the planet spinning
within my own heart.
Breathing in, I welcomed the whole universe,
breathing out I dissolved into space.
This normal, humble moment,
made extraordinary
by the importance we’ve assigned to it.