No matter what, I’m learning.
I’m learning that beyond duality
there’s a gorgeous realm of seeing
without the labels
of right or wrong
good or bad
male or female.
We could also call it
the realm of being
or the realm of experiencing.
It’s where the mind
that fixates on the past
or projects into the future
doesn’t hold the same sway,
where the living, breathing moment
holds us and relaxes us
to the point that we can open to it and welcome it
like we would an old friend or lover
who knows all there is to know about us
and loves us anyway.
If you’re wondering how long it will take,
how it will happen,
when you’ll feel strong enough,
This isn’t a fill in the blank test.
This is your life.
There are no proper answers.
There is only you, opening as awareness
to what is alive in this moment.
Can you soften and relax
into the possibility
that you were led precisely here
because there was something
you could learn
from this living, breathing moment?
Love this moment.
This moment is your life.
When life asks you to change
by pulling the rug out from under you,
when your relationship falls apart,
when your health suddenly fails,
when a source of abundance suddenly dries up,
when nothing makes sense anymore,
to cling to the past is sheer insanity.
At that point, the most lucid response would be
to take a deep breath and feel into the moment,
to see what the moment is asking of you.
The answers are here, now,
in your beating heart,
in leaves stirred by an invisible wind,
in the changing of the seasons,
in the rhythm of your days and nights.
Release the past that is no longer relevant
to the person you are becoming.
Face your future with open arms,
and see what the moment is asking of you.
It’s a simple way,
a simple truth,
a simple life—
to simply open your heart
to all that is.
The trouble is,
you don’t need a product
or an expert to show you how to use it,
and so this way isn’t advertised,
and so most of us don’t know about it.
But I promise you,
I will spend my whole life
living this open-hearted way as much as I can.
And maybe my open heart
could help other hearts to open
along this path I walk.
To know that I coaxed just one heart open
by living my simple life…
now that’s success!
Opening into spacious awareness,
relaxing open into the moment
as it presents itself,
this is my practice.
I’ve been working on identifying the feeling,
and breathing into the center of it…
then breathing out a willingness to feel.
Not change, fix, analyze, interpret, judge or understand,
but just feel.
I felt called to bring this practice to my students
and have had the privilege to teach
four times already this week.
I am so grateful for this work where
I find something that helps and heals,
and then I get to share it with others.
The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.—Marcus Aurelius, 121-180 c.e.
I sit down to write and feel blocked
because my open and honest expression
might be twisted and used as evidence
by the one I formerly trusted with my heart
that there is something wrong with me.
(That something wrong being that I’m a human
going through a particularly tough time.)
And so I embrace a sort of forced positivity,
which cannot be all bad, right?
I mean, for God’s sake,
I have clean drinking water, on demand,
water to bathe with, a toilet inside my house…
This puts me in the top 20% of the world’s population.
I have voting rights.
I have my health.
I have my mind.
I have a college education.
I have work that I love
and two beautiful children
and an opportunity to start over fresh
every single blessed day.
In essence, I’m being blocked from complaining,
and this impediment to complaints
advances my ability to celebrate what is working.
This open and honest expression
might also be twisted and used as evidence
that there is someting wrong with me,
but if this is the case,
then it only reveals what is wrong
with the reasoning faculties
of the person doing the twisting and judging.
Therefore, thank you, dear soul,
for giving me cause to pause
and go on a negativity diet.
I shall grow fat with gratitude and grace.
$-25.38 in my checking account
Hey mom, may I borrow $100
until I get paid tomorrow?
I’m sorry to have to ask
but I’ve been out of
my thyroid meds for five days and…
$74.62 in my checking account,
driving to the pharmacy
This too will pass.
$34.63 in my checking accout,
I have everything I need
to turn my life around.
Louise Hay said
Money is energy
and an exchange of resources.
How much I have
depends on how much
I believe I deserve.
If that’s true,
something in me thinks
I don’t deserve very much.
According to my checking account
I’m not worth much at all…
I feel like curling into a ball,
shrinking away from the world.
I force myself to eat lunch,
and then I sit down
to do some EFT Tapping.
Amid tears and terror,
I affirm that I always have enough money
to live my most authentic life.
Now, God, what now?