Tag Archives: reality

Gratitude, Day 33 of 48: Freedom

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I have this power to choose
and I choose freedom.
I choose to see how inextricably connected
I am with All That Is
and to communicate deeply with consciousness
as it presents itself in the present moment.
I choose to surrender into being
to dissolve the illusion of confinement within me
so that I can truly experience the ultimate freedom.
I let go of my definition of this moment.
What arrives is truth, reality, the freedom to be
exactly who I am, accepting my humanity,
in love with life the way it is…

Mountains and Avalanches

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I was sifting through
mountains of papers
looking for something.
One of the mountains shifted,
sending an avalanche to the floor.
And then in the next second,
another avalanche.
And I said,
Okay, me too.
So I fell to the floor,
lay down on my back,
stared up at the track lighting
on my ceiling.
Here we all are, on the floor.
Now what?
I felt my body was tired.
I didn’t want to search anymore.
I knew that whatever it was,
either it would turn up,
or I would replace it.
So I went upstairs,
and I got in bed,
and had dreams
about mountains and avalanches.

Feeling

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You can’t heal what you can’t feel…
and so my biggest task
has been just allowing the feelings to rise,
to be seen, acknowledged, embraced,
and finally felt.
For a long time I attempted to deny my feelings,
because they appeared too painful to accept,
and I was afraid of what might happen
if I allowed the tidal wave to crash over me.
It turns out that I was giving my attention
to my fear of the difficult feelings
rather than to the feelings themselves.
The fear made it all seem so much worse
that it really was.
Once I peeled back all my layers
of distraction, denial and defense
and exposed my tender heart to myself,
I saw that there was nothing to fear.
As the grief came up, the doubt,
the self-blame, the regret, the anger,
the loneliness, the abandonment,
the resistance and all the others
emerged as a procession,
one by one, to be fully received
and welcomed by me.
As I allowed these feelings to flow through,
I sensed underneath them my resilience,
my strength, and finally my hope
for new feelings to arrive
once I’ve made enough room for them
by letting the old feelings go…

Past and Future

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I can’t know what’s next;
I can only know what’s now.
I’m not sure how
much of me is really here
to look deeply into what is.
I wonder how much of me
is truly available
to receive this present.
I keep practicing.
One day,
I might awaken
to what I already knew
long ago
before the world
taught me
about
past and future.

I’m Home

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Nothing is ever still.
Even window glass is liquid,
although it flows at a pace
far too slow for our eyes to detect.
And our eyes…
they only see certain wavelengths of light.
Our ears…
they only hear certain frequencies of sound.
When I remember
that I simply do not have the faculties
to grasp the inifinite nature
of what is really happening,
I can deep a breath,
take a step back,
and recognize
that the thing I call a “problem”
is just another play of phenomena
in this ever changing world of form.
As I relax around the many plays of form,
I can tune into what is formless in me.
And then…I’m home.