Hey, Inner Critic,
it’s time we had a chat.
You see, you can stop
telling me I have to figure it all out,
no one has it all figured out.
We’re all in a process of becoming.
So stop it already with the pressure,
and the anxiety, and the belief
that I have to be more, do more, have more.
When I’m free of you for just a moment,
it’s actually quite pleasant.
I can breathe and feel free in this moment,
all I ever have.
I can relax.
The struggle is over.
I can breathe.
I am safe.
I can step forward.
I am powerful.
I can realize this was always true.
In this spacious present
I can relax, breathe,
recognize that everything is ok.
Why has so much of my time been spent
being educated away from what is here?
Can I unlearn enough
to have the space in my mind
to be truly present?
What would I do with such clarity,
such immense and immediate expansion?
Knowing that I could never shrink back
to what I was before,
is it safe to leave behind what is familiar
and face the adventure before me?
I wake up in darkness
although the sun is out.
It’s the same old familiar feeling
of uncertainty for the future,
for not having it all figured out by now.
Then Grace steps in and speaks
gently and lovingly to me:
Everything will be revealed
in the proper time, space and sequence.
Your job is to stay open
to this process of shedding the old
so that you can receive the new.
Believe me, it’s worth it.
This is the third time
I’ve attempted to write this poem.
It just isn’t coming out
as I expected.
I guess this means I’m human,
and I guess it means I’m alive.
when I can ever be satisfied
with myself as I am,
life as it is;
when I can drop
the bs perfectionism bit,
and just relax already.
And when you can finally
relax into the truth
of who you really are
you will find
the most gentle sweetness
waiting for you everywhere—
Life, loving you as you really are.
It occurred to me
that every second I spend
trying to get him
to give me the money
that is mine by law
is a second I divert my attention
from the mission
of creating my own money
by offering value to the world
doing the things I know how to do best.
I’m choosing to let go.
I was told not to hold my breath
so I’m breathing,
slowly and deeply
and with gratitude
that I can wake up to this moment
and open to being taught.
It’s going to be okay.
I feel that now.
Last year I worked on cultivating trust,
and this year, I chose freedom.
As I trust, I relax into being,
and this moment opens up
and shows me what I need to know….
Or more precisely,
I open up
and I can finally see
what this moment
was trying to show me all along.
Yes. I open up,
and then I can receive
the gifts that were always there,
awaiting my opening.
I open up
and the whole universe is delighted
to shower me with the love and the abundance
that now gets to be expressed through me,
through my willingness to trust and to be free.
Back home after a harrowing journey,
a night time drive of 212 miles
in fog and driving rain
over hills and mountains
and high speed highways.
A lot of prayers were uttered
as I drove through plumes of rain
kicked up by semi after semi,
my two children in the back seat,
completely oblivious to how
dangerous it was
as the car hydroplaned
on many occasions,
gusts of wind
spraying wet leaves across the road…
Visibility was low
and I felt myself growing tense
with the responsibility
of keeping us all alive…
one wrong move
and we could all be gone
in an instant.
I finally put on the hazard lights
and slowed way down to be safe
in the fog and the rain.
And it occurs to me now
that the same can be applied
when going through
harrowing mental and emotional weather–
slow down, proceed with caution,
we cannot see what’s ahead
and there is bound to be
all kinds of weather,
so relax into this journey of life…
the path is the destination.
Letting go of the linear thinking
Things need to be THIS way,
My mind is open
to seeing different solutions–
and what was once a problem
now becomes an opportunity
for a new experience,
a chance to dig deeper
and bring more of my true self
to the surface of my understanding.
May I relax
when my mind panics
because it is uncomfortable with uncertainty,
and may I breathe deeply
and find the clarity to remember
There are no problems, only opportunities.