Tag Archives: self-esteem

Gratitude, Day 29 of 48: Self-forgiveness

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When he left I tried to forgive him.
I wanted to forgive him and I wanted to forgive the other woman.
But as much as I tried, it wasn’t working.
I was still angry, lonely, grieving.
I was still terrified, feeling betrayed, victimized.
Then I realized I didn’t need to work on forgiving them,
I needed to work on forgiving myself.
I am training myself to understand
that I’m worthy of love even if I’m not perfect.
I’m working on forgiving myself
for tolerating the way I was treated in my marriage.
I’m working on forgiving myself for being human.
With the focus back on me I can actually feel
my body/spirit/mind/heart/self as it heals.
I’m finally getting to know the woman I am,
and I’m discovering that I love her.

What One Was Born To Do

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Well…I got a lot done today,
and that feels good.
I definitely did not have the luxury
of lying in a ball of anxiety.
(Thank goodness for my yoga teaching gig;
it made me clean myself up and leave my house).
Off to my next class in a moment,
and my body is so tired,
yet I know I will do just fine.
Dinner is ready for the kids,
the sitter is on her way,
the kitchen is tidy,
and I’m about to teach again.
It’s amazing how good one feels
when one is doing
what one was born to do.*

*Now if only I could make enough money teaching yoga to support myself and my kids…but I’m starting to figure out ways to open up other streams of income, and all of it together, fingers crossed, will work out just fine. As soon as I figure out how not to be homeless, that is…