And then a friend sent me a link
to spiritual teacher Matt Kahn’s
video entitled The Pain of Loss,
and it rocked my world.
I thought of how I had been
trying to escape my pain,
seeing it as evidence of failure,
and here was someone saying
that our bigges mistake is
our attempt to bypass the pain
so that we can continue on our path.
Instead, if we can see that our pain IS the path,
if we can see that
our devastation leads to transformation,
we’ll join with the Divine as co-creators,
and live into our fullest destiny
as embodied masters.
What the what?
So it is in my enduring
that I come to know my greatest strength?
I can allow the Universe to
turn me upside down and shake me out
and I can emerge on the other side
more loving, compassionate and clearer
than ever before?
I’m going to go and digest this now.
Thanks for listening.
PS I would love to hear all about your stories of transformation following great loss and deep pain. Have you learned how to see pain as a great teacher? Have you learned to embrace painful experiences as opportunities for profound growth? How long did your initiation take? How long did you stay in the crucible, allowing life to burn away what you no longer needed for the journey ahead? I welcome anything you’re willing to share. Knowing that I’m not alone in my profound suffering has helped me realize that I’m part of this big human family, and I’d like to think that somehow in the sharing of our stories we’re collectively helping the human race to grow and evolve.
For a few days
I step away from the routine.
I sleep differently,
move my body in different ways.
I’m intentional with my time;
choosing only those activities
that deepen my connection with Spirit.
It’s a sacred time,
a prayerful time,
a time filled with infinite possibilities.
I dream that all sentient beings
may take such time for themselves.
As we retreat from the world outside,
we return to the home within.
No better welcome could ever be found
than the homecoming provided
by the One
who stands at the door of your heart
for your arrival.
Giving so much…
wanting to give…
and then feeling so tired.
Is this how to live?
Is there a giving that doesn’t deplete
but actually fills and refreshes the giver
once the giving is complete?
I want to understand
the nature of a giving soul
and the way some manage to find the energy
to perform superhuman acts of generosity.
I want to know how to give what matters.
And each night
I want to rest my head contentedly
knowing I gave my all
to this day, to this moment, to this life.
My cup is spilling over,
with joy, gratitude, connection.
I have arrived fully in this moment,
standing in the center of my self.
The one who sought fulfillment,
the one who wanted to be loved,
the one who longed to be seen, heard and held,
the one who desired safety, protection,
the one who wished to be taken care of,
the one who yearned to know God’s love—
that one takes a deep breath,
and knows that she is home.
So many choices in each moment.
What to create?
Is it time to rest?
I choose to sing.
I record my voice and listen.
I like the way it sounds,
so I keep going.
I’m learning something
about creativity and pleasure,
trusting myself in the process.
Remembering life is right now.
I keep questioning,
realizing there are no answers.
Questions are doors and windows
to new possibilities;
my spirit challenges me
Is this faith,
to believe there is more
out there for me
even though I can’t
I summon gratitude,
help me take action.